I can’t remember when I first heard of the word “Autism” – definitely not during my younger years. As this term is being openly advocated nowadays, for some people, such small word carries a heavier meaning. It doesn’t mean those who can’t feel much ease accepting Autism are far less sympathetic human beings. One must understand where a person is coming from before rendering any judgment.
How is it having a kid labeled with Autism? Does it matter which side of the spectrum that kid falls? Low functioning, high functioning? It can rather be confusing. Honestly hard to take in. Something non-existent in one’s culture and upbringing; this is such a big blow. Is it ego or something else?
Isn’t it wonderful having a kid so smart that he can charm people of his wits? Of course, it is, it feels like you’ve done something right in your parenthood. But what if there are other signs beyond that smartness that points to a disability? So to speak upon evaluation and some screening we were confirmed to have a high functioning kid. Someone who’s quite intelligent, very logical, sharp memory, analytical, and very inflexible. What a relief to know that kid’s brain is something else, though not lacking, can be quite challenging.
This article is not about bragging how smart our kid seems to be. Taking on that aspect lessens the stab in our hearts, thus giving us comfort that he’ll be okay in the long run. Being smart is not all that one needs to thrive, being high functioning comes with certain hardships. In our kid’s case, being inflexible doesn’t make it easy for him to adapt to everything in his environment. Peers don’t understand his ways because of his logical approach; things can be black and white and very literal. His young mind can grasp simpler things and always tend to be more complicated in analyzing things—a kid whose mind defies fictitious ideas and prefers to indulge with matters backed by facts and realism.
It’s fascinating to see how much knowledge one has at such a young age. The same time it is scary, not knowing how capable are we to sustain him. What do we do? Fears of acceptance, dejection and unfair judgement made us weak upon learning what our kid has. Indeed he’s unique and gifted, but how do we handle it? Honestly it took some time for us to even open our hearts and minds to accept his Autism. Something non-existent in our culture growing up felt such a scary thing. We did not understand how amazing this can be for him in the future. Accepting Autism was a hard lesson for us as parents, our fears of being judged by our families took a toll in embracing our kid’s great ability.
In the end, we found peace within our hearts and ease in our minds when we stopped thinking of what others would say and think about the label Autism. It’s all about our kid, after all, we have to advocate for him, and we have to help him polish that gem within him. Accepting Autism didn’t come in an instant, there were struggles, and it’s normal. Don’t feel like you’re giving less to your kid because of that. Embrace your kid, his abilities, disabilities, differences, and strengths – this is what we parents need to do. It may take time, but once we fully understand our fears and hopes, accepting Autism would be the best thing.